So what is Simon Belmont doing in this episode of Captain N: The Game Master, and why is he so happy about it? Why, he’s milking a cow, of course! What did you think, you sickos?!

~Race

I say nothing, except that Mass Effect is awesome.

Oh, and thanks to Kami, who let me use that shot in the second panel. You know you want to try it.

~Race

Edit: Okay, so I saw this this morning on Player’s Pulse. It’s a rap about mineral probing by Kabuto the Python, complete with a remix of the scanning music, so it totally goes with today’s comic. Fantastic!

Those Minerals – Kabuto the Python

I know it’s probably not relevant anymore, but I just couldn’t help myself. (NSFW!) Mass Effect came out for PC not too long ago, so maybe the few of you who are still playing it may give this comic some relevance. Maybe. I’ve mentioned before how I have this intense penchant for everything Mass Effect, and I thought I would comment on the unfairness of their romance subplots. For those of you who have played it, you can understand my frustration and may chuckle at the comic. For those of you who havent…well, you get some side-boob action anyway.

In other news, I need to address a few site-related things:

- You may have noticed an an unofficial podcast and video.

- You may also have noticed that I put Digg buttons on all the comic item pages. If you don’t see the Digg button on top of the title, click on the title itself. I’m working on a better way to do this. I’m trying to get Level 99 a little more widespread, so if you have a Digg account and genuinely like a comic, please, Digg away!

- I also wanted to note that the Java Chatroom has been fixed, and people are able to get in again. I idle in there while I’m at my job sometimes. Come peek your head in, but I may be taking pictures of ugly purses, so you’re best to catch chatroom activity after 6 p.m. Pacific Standard Time.

- Lastly, I just wanted to address that I have no idea what the fuck is going on with our web server, and I apologize for all the down time. It’s either because our webserver is a douchebag, or we’re really really popular and all the traffic is killing the site. I’m feeling self-deprecating today, so I’m figuring that the former is the more likely explanation. I’ll call my server about this issue soon.

Incidentally, as of this moment, Level 99 is #14 on The Webcomiclist! Holy cow! I don’t update for six freaking months, then I do four comics and we jump like 800 spots! You guys must really like us. =P Thanks everyone, for your support and your visits that may be artificially raising our ranking. We’re not worthy!

~Race

I think Arlo stuffs socks into his bikini…

So yeah, hey guys, it’s me! It’s been a while since I’ve made a lone post ’round these here parts, but I need to update you on the new stuff here at Level 99! So here we go!

Wow, that’s a lot of stuff! I hope you can remember it all. I apologize again for the lack of comic update on Friday, but I was busy trying to make the site more enjoyable for the greater good. Okay, maybe the majority of the time I spent sleeping, BUT STILL! Anyway, thanks for your patience and support, guys! You Level 99ers are AWESOME TO THE MAX!!! =D *hugs*

~Race

In big bold letters at the very top it says:

Wii

it’s coming…

Perhaps, if your product name is a euphemism for penis, you should be avoiding ejaculatory idioms, Nintendo.

-Arlo

So yeah, it took longer than I thought it would, but 63 installments in, and we finally get to see Race out of those boring jeans and white hoodie and into something much less comfortable. All for the sake of your enjoyment, you sickos…oh, and for plot development, I guess.

I like to play games online, particularly first person shooters, but I’ve never dabbled in the competitive gaming circuit (although I’ve always wanted to), so I can’t claim to have our current strip to account for real life experiences. I just don’t have the time to practice. I can’t even crank these damn strips out on time! >.< I haven’t had much experience playing these sorts of games with other girls, either, although I’ve lurked in “grrl gamer” forums and I think the main difference between competitive gaming between boys and girls, is that instead of talking a bunch of shit, girls tend to be extremely supportive and adopt that whole “go, sister, go” attitude. That’s why those girls are mudwrestling in the background. They’re supporting each other. ^.~

At any rate, I try to get in as much gaming as I can, and for the past week or so, I’ve been playing nothing but Quake 4. If you wanna come frag with me, my Xfire name is “level99.” I need some Xfire buddies who play similar games as I do…all the people on my list play WoW. Doh.

It’s late. I need to go to bed. Stupid job. YOU! Stop playing WoW so late!

~Race

Ooo, the plot thickens. And sure enough, Arlo’s behavior is a little more questionable. This’ll be the last cross-dressing joke for a while. I just couldn’t help it.

This weekend was a success. Only problem is that success for my birthday meant no strip on Friday. All Apologies. However, we make it up to you by vicarious partiage. Troll is there with his werewolf pants. Race is there with her coconut bra.

Also, expect a new episode of our podcast soon.

-Arlo

Oh, Jesus. This is continuity again, isn’t it? Son of a bitch. Fuck. [this post is not safe for work... just thought you should know...] We both want a PS3 but the odds that we are going to get one at launch are slim to none. I can get one. I have the ways, just not the means. But, don’t worry. We’ll find some means. We’ll find some if it means putting on some redundantly assless chaps and… you know, I don’t really know what Plan C is. Race? Could you field this one? I’m not sure what I’ve gotten myself into, here.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Hitch your wagon to a star.” Well, apparently, this is a damn shooting star. Race and I have never really wanted to follow in the footsteps of Penny Arcade or dwell in the comfortable shadow that they cast (giants, as they are). However, we’d be lying if we said we didn’t want our venture to head in that same general direction. Like ‘em or not (the correct answer is “not,” you mutinous dogs), they feast on the supple teat of infamy. Oh, such a sweet teat.

Hehe. Teat.

Oh, and check this out. Your wish is granted. Now we just need those blue ones and the plan is complete. Nefarious is a good word that often springs to mind when phrases like “the plan is complete” are typed. I’m not so sure what’s nefarious about a pink DS. Or perhaps, it’s the most nefarious device of all.

Hehe. Nefarious.

-Arlo

This is our first NSFW comic. That’s right. Not the one with the pasties (that got “censored” on MySpace, if you weren’t around at the time); not the one with the sexy nipple; not the one that blasphemes; not the one where Mario gives Peach the mega mushroom. No. The one where the door kinda looks like a vagina. I suppose it doesn’t help that the other doorway is blatantly an asshole.

The two doors are from Prey, by the way. If you haven’t at least tried it, pick it up when it drops in price. It ain’t half bad.

-Arlo

“What up?” Pirate Bay is what’s up. Sweden got all nervous and forgot simple law for a bit. Read into it what you will. It seems to me that the MPAA got upitty and decided that Pirate Bay sounds like it should be illegal and put pressure in key places. Truthiness in action. Apparently that backfired and those key places are getting sued. YAY! Suck it, Trebek.

Race came over to my pad the other day with a couple of friends of ours and played some Beatmania and got a little antsy. That’s right… we got crazy. We bought Guitar Hero. Man, I knew this game was supposed to be hot, but I didn’t know it was blue fire. Texas Flood is by far my favorite song on there. Who knew I was at heart a blues musician? Can’t wait for the sequel so Race and I can jam instead of taking turns or battling. If you can’t wait either, you can check this out for a preview.

Hollah back, young’n.

-Arlo.